My sister and I were talking about how it is easy to get talking negatively with certain people. Sometimes it's because the person is just negative but sometimes it's more because you just start sharing experiences that are alike and they all happen to be negative.
People are always talking about the importance of connecting over common ground* during small talk or even when you are preparing for heavier topics (like as a missionary).
But lately I've been thinking about how sometimes it is so tempting to make the connection that I emphasize something in my life to do so.
For example, when talking to someone shy sometimes I talk up my feelings of social inadequacy. When someone is complaining about the heat I talk about how sunny it was that morning.
It isn't as though those things are not things I've felt or noticed but they just aren't as big a deal as I portrayed.
When this happens the common ground is built but I'm just not sure it is the positive, accurate common ground that is firm enough for continued interaction. So how do you build on common ground without inaccurate emphasis? I have no idea. Perhaps it doesn't actually matter that much and I just think too much.... that's been known to happen.
*No I do not have any sources for this statement.
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